MacYapper

Monday, May 26, 2008

HAPPY FREAKIN' MEMORIAL DAY EDITION


MacYapper - John McIntire


FREE CYRIL! GO PENS! GET WELL TEDDY!


www.izzazu.com

Yo, yo, yo, MacYippers! What up?
Actually I think it's bad form to say "happy" Memorial day. But then, I'm an American, so whatdya want? My father was a captain in WWII. Did a lot of recon. Commanded a company. Helped liberate concentration camps. Like many of the modest men Brokaw wrote about, he didn't talk about it much.

The above photo is my Dad and Mom (both no longer with us) at the now defunct Jack Dempsey's Bar in New York City. Always loved this photo. So "of" the period. My mother often talked about livin' large at J.D.'s that night. Here's to all the vets, including the ones not lucky enough to marry a babe and hang out once at a cool famous bar in NYC.

HILLARY, DILLARY, DOCK

This blog gives me a platform to vent. It's not exactly Drudge, but I get hundreds of hits per day. But why should I hog all the venting space? Why should I monopolize the
hot air? Why shouldn't guest gasbags have an opportunity to bloviate?

I mean, how many angels dance on the head of a pin? And what if a wood chuck could chuck wood?




So here is a guest MacYipper commenting on the good ship Hillary, which it seems, may never pull into port and finally dock. Instead she may Dillary all the way to Denver.

MAC-YIPPER LINDA ON HILLARY
The "assassination" remarks show, I think, the downside of talking points. She and her advisers of course pot together a set of talking points about why she would stay in the race once it is mathematically impossible to win the majority of pledged delegates (and thus not likely to win the super delegates either).

Clearly, they decided to reference Bill's 1992 race and the Robert Kennedy assassination, because at a venue with editors and reporters, she wouldn't have trotted out something off the top of her head. Note that she could have merely said "the 1968 election was hotly contested into June, " but she didn't. She brought up the assassination. And she did it once before, in March, in a comment to Time Magazine. So I think it was something she planned to say.



So the question would be, why was the talking point framed this way? One benign reason is that the Kennedy assassination is a vivid reminder of the old days when campaigns started in the spring and ended with the convention. But here is a more likely reason: In 1968 the convention ended in chaos and a loss for the party. When she referenced RFK's assassination, i think she was evoking an entire spectrum of bad possibilities for Democrats in '08.

As in 1968, there is a young, charismatic leader who is the darling of the liberal end of the party. he is raising issues about war and talking about change. Hlllary wants to suggest that his candidacy will lead inevitably to some sort of tragedy and certainly to a Dem defeat in '08.

Talking about '68 reminds moderate and conservative Dems about all of the things that have dogged the party since then and made it hard for them to win the White House (the combination of galvanized young people, anti-war sentiment, militant blacks, a chaotic convention).

That's her message to the supers... it'll be '68 all over again. And to talk about it in the context of "why I am still running" allowed her to slip the message in with some plausible deniability. She got away with it the first time. Maybe Huckabee's failed joke about Obama's assassination altered the context, but certainly Ted Kennedy's illness heightened everyone's emotions about Kennedys past and present.


No one wants to relive those assassinations, or live through another one, but the Dems who remember and love Robert Kennedy would never want to yank the nomination from Obama because we aren't brave enough to risk what he is brave enough to risk.

I think Hillary was publicly using the Rovian tactic of fear against Democrats, and it backfired. God only knows what she has been saying to super delegates in private.

MacYipper Linda

MacYapper - Should The White Chick get the benefit of the doubt? Or is the cynical interpretation the correct one? Beats the F outta me. But thank you MacYipper Linda.

Tomorrow we'll hear from MacYipper Char.

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ROCK ON MAC-YIPPERS! EAT SOME BURNED DEAD ANIMAL FLESH FOR ME!

email me at johnmcintire@comcast.net

Saturday, May 24, 2008

ANNIE OAKLEY SHOOTS HERSELF IN THE FOOT


MacYapper - John McIntire


FREE CYRIL! GO PENS! GET WELL TEDDY!


www.izzazu.com

Yo, yo, yo, MacYippers! What up?

OK, I'm Mr. Know-It-All. But this time I'm stumped. Diabolically calculating or monumentally stupid, or both?


There is one conclusion I have drawn. Hillary should get out of the race. Because even if you buy the notion that she meant no harm and was simply drawing awkward but semi-valid historical comparisons of some sort, she's still completely full of shit.

If you haven't seen it, look at the video:

http://www.breitbart.tv/html/101403.html

As many have now pointed out, even if you give her a mulligan for campaign fatigue, even if you assume she's too good a person to try to haunt Super Delegates with the specter of an Obama assassination attempt, her logic is total crap.

Bobby didn't enter the race until May. Assassinated in June. Bobby hadn't been in for months and months and months. Hillary's first caucus was the first week in January.


Simple mathematics didn't make it impossible for Bobby to win. Bobby didn't have to try to re-jigger the rules of the game, to make up new ones, so that he could win.

http://www.time-blog.com/swampland/2008/05/hillarys_bizarre_rfk_comment.html

According to the above link, Bill Clinton had effectively wrapped up his campaign in March of 1992, with a late but not imposing threat from Jerry Brown.


So here's the thing. She's just makin' shit up again. It's Bosnia Fever. Since Bobby's UNBELIEVABLY LATE AND SHORT campaign with a tragic end has NOTHING to do with an endless campaign she mathematically can't win, there is NO PLAUSIBLE HISTORICAL ANALOGY and NO VALID COMPARISON to be made here. Unless of course you're just makin' shit up. And she is fabricating out of thin air big time.

And she's SO freaking disingenuous when they ask her WHY she's being "pushed out" of the race. "I don't know," she quizzically mutters, when OBVIOUSLY she's just trying to get the reporters to reach the conclusion that it's EVIL SEXISM at play here.

As I opined on OFF Q last night (as if one's words are more valid if you utter then in television), Hillary has suffered from sexism, Barack has suffered from racism, and both have been the victims of sensationalism, since this race is more fun than a barrel of monkeys for the ink stained wretches, microphone maroons, and babbling bloggers.

But at this point, the only reason people want her to get out is so THE BLACK DUDE can get on about the business of GETTING THE REPUBLICANS OUT OF THE WHITE HOUSE!


That's it! It's not because Hillary is a woman. It's because she's delaying the beginning of the real campaign. It's because she's selfishly deepening all the divisions in the Democratic party. And it's because she's obviously delirious. But I think what bothers me more is the disingenuous nature of her comments.

She's just riffin.' She's just fabricatin.' Ah, THE WHITE CHICK, dropping her "g's" to be more appealing to regular folk. Bad acting is a pain to watch, but especially when the PLAY NEVER EVER EVER EVER ENDS!

Well she's not the only one with a weak historical analogy to make a point.


I've told you I'm certain she wants the VEEP and that's why she's been soldiering on. But she won't get it now because she JUST SHOT HERSELF IN THE FOOT. Annie Oakley went a little trigger happy with a loaded tongue, and has insured that Michelle Obama will NO WAY IN HELL allow her to get the number two spot.


The only thing that has been killed in this election cycle is THE WHITE CHICK'S chances of being on the ticket. Bing, bang, boom.

Now look, she's got millions of dollars. She's got a good job. She's got one swell hubby. So let's stop feeling sorry for Hillary and let her ride off into the sunset with grace, dignity, and a bright future to look forward to.

Just get out, will ya? Before you embarrass yourself further. You're better than this.

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ROCK ON MAC-YIPPERS!

Except you Hillary. You could stop rockin' know please.

Email me at johnmcintire@comcast.net

Friday, May 23, 2008

MAYOR EXPOSED BY MAYO EDITION


MacYapper - John McIntire



FREE CYRIL! GO PENS! GET WELL TEDDY!

A LIVE EDITION OF OFF Q TONIGHT AT 7:30! www.wqed.org

Join Mean Bill Green, Heather "Dead Mink" Heidelbaugh, The Law Firm Of Valerie, McDonald, Roberts, your own MacYapper, and Moderator Chris Less Is Moore, as we yap about crap... mostly local. You can't beat it with a stick. Or a shtick.


www.izzazu.com

Yo, yo, yo, MacYippers! What up?

Hey, Mayor Opie is a fibber. He's Fibber Mc Gee. He's Fibber McFibberstein.
Fibber? I don't even know 'er.

Lil' Lukey has been saying it's the City Council's fault that they couldn't hang giant Go Pens banners dahntahn. But it turns out it's the Mayor's own staff that nixed the deal, as emails obtained by the relentlessly dogged Channel Four's Bob Hold The Mayo prove. Click Below:

http://www.thepittsburghchannel.com/video/16366976/index.html

Mayo of course is the former keyboard player for Peter Frampton, turned ace reporter.
Our thanks to "The Burgher" for tipping us off to this fine piece of work by Hold The Mayo. Check out The Burgher's own take on it below.

http://burghreport.blogspot.com/

Little Lukey is playing more kids games. Why I don't know. But does it really matter? You love him anyway, because he's cute as a bug in a rug. Cute as a button.

Meantime, apparently Cheapy McCheapstein had a revelation and (gasp!) decided to pay for the freaking Pens tickets at the opening games in Detroit... GET THIS... STOP THE PRESSES... PHONE THE NEIGHBORS, WAKE THE KIDS... OUT OF HIS OWN POCKET!!!!!!!!!


POST-GAZETTE.COM:
http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/08144/884291-85.stm
After initially asking the city Law Department for a ruling on whether he could accept free tickets as part of the trip, Mr. Ravenstahl decided yesterday to pay for all expenses out of his own pocket, spokeswoman Joanna Doven said. Tickets to the first two games will cost him $350 each.

"He's pretty sure it's legal to pay for it himself so he preferred to go that route," Ms. Doven said.

The city code bars the mayor from taking anything of value from anybody with business before the city, with exceptions including official travel and sporting event tickets worth no more than $100.

Mr. Ravenstahl ended up in hot water last year after attending a high-dollar charity golf outing as a guest of the Penguins and the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center. As a result, he requested the Law Department ruling, but didn't wait for the answer before deciding to pay his own way.

MacYapper - He requested the Law Department ruling because he was STILL looking for a way to get freebies. Then it occurred to him that he looks like the FREEBIE SEEKING WHORE he is. So he got a clue. Which is big. For him. Ever.



HILLARY RERUN WORTH WATCHING AGAIN

Meantime, you may have already seen this video, but it's so freaking funny it deserves repetition.
It's Amy P.'s SNL send-up of Hillary. Check it ott:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/05/11/saturday-night-lives-mess_n_101177.html

BITCHING BOB ASSAILS MADMAN MADDEN

I remember cheering in the Pirates press box for a Sammy Sosa home run during the historic McGuire/Sosa home run record year (now terribly tainted by the steroid scandal), and getting a condescending look from a murderer's row of sportsies, including a guy I now consider a friend but didn't know then, the mustachioed occasionally condescending (in a good way) Johnny Steigerwald.

Why do I bring this up? Because that's when I learned that the sportsies have a code of ethics that you better damn well not violate. Although cheering in the press box was pretty stupid in my part, along with my old NightTalk producer Jonesy.

In standup comedy I tell a story about Myron Cope, prefaced with the assertion that all the sportsies in town secretly, and in some cases not so secretly, hate one another.

In this case, the word is out. Smizik hates Madden. As revealed in the past, I'm a Madden fan. I think Smizik writes one of the consistently best sports columns I've ever written. I'm a fan of traditional journalism, and column writing, done well. And he does it well. He's not as lyrical as Collier, but he's grumpy and great. So I've got nothing against Bob, whose done both my TV and radio shows a number of times.

But as someone who has been known to be somewhat edgy on the airwaves, at least for this town, I am defensive about my colleague Mark Madden. Of course I'm also a fan of tasteless humor. And Mark's edgy style keeps me awake.

I continue to be fascinated by Bob Smizik's attempt to get Madden fired. As someone who knows something about getting fired, I empathize with Mark. He recently had a brush with death (employment-wise) and survived. But that won't last long, if Smizik has anything to say about it.

POST-GAZETTE.COM - BOB SMIZIK:
http://post-gazette.com/pg/08144/884238-194.stm
Taking into account two national tragedies of historical and monumental proportions -- the assassinations of two of Kennedy's brothers, President John F. Kennedy in 1963 and Sen. Robert F. Kennedy in 1968 -- Madden said the following early on his Wednesday show:

"I'm very disappointed to hear that Senator Ted Kennedy of Massachusetts is near death because of a brain tumor. I always hoped Senator Kennedy would live long enough to be assassinated.

"I wonder if he got a card from the Kopechnes."

MacYapper -
Full disclosure... last night at the Obey House Tavern I did a Ted Kennedy Mary Jo Kopechne joke about that little drowning incident back in '69.

Now Madden would never get away with this in New England. Although DJ Lou Brutus in Providence did used to play his Ted Kennedy Irish Jig song...
"Oh your brother is dead
and your brother is dead,
your ex wife is a lush
and your brother is dead..."

I digress. As to what Madden said, is it tasteless? Yes. Is it funny? Perhaps, if like me, you have a sick sense of humor. Is it appropriate for sports radio? Not in the narrowly defined confines of what is considered "acceptable." But if you listen to Madden's show you listen for edge.

I'm doing more standup these days in part because it's the last bastion of free speech. Must all sports radio be x's and o's? Must we all be Dan Patrick (yawn)?

And why does Bob Smizik want to get Madden fired so badly. Is it because of all those Bozo the Clown jokes Madden made at Smizik's expense?


POST-GAZETTE.COM:
The only explanation for Madden not being fired, suspended or at least publicly reprimanded for the Kennedy remark involves the blockbuster ratings his show received in the final book of 2007, which came out after he promised to change his ways. Madden had a rating above 8.0, which is extremely high for sports talk and the highest of his career.

MacYapper - I'm shocked, SHOCKED, to discover that the only thing radio executives care about is ratings. Why, it would appear they care even more about making money than good taste! How can this be?


POST-GAZETTE.COM:
At the same time, Madden would have no other option in Pittsburgh. Clear Channel, which operates the only other sports-talk station in town, would not tolerate his act.

Madden's calling card has been consistently going after high-profile people, including Myron Cope, Jerome Bettis, Franco Harris, Arnold Palmer and Jim Leyland. It made no difference that his attacks were filled with half-truths. The vitriol drove the ratings and made him sound tough.

MacYapper - It is true that Clear Channel never has been interested in Madden. It is also true that CBS expressed more than a passing interest last year, before my old station The Zone folded like a house of cards. And it's likely they wouldn't hire him at stodgy KDKA, another former hangout for moi.

But that doesn't mean he doesn't give you entertaining radio. I will repeat myself. I
ENJOY it when he attacks Cope, Bettis, Harris, Palmer and Leyland. Cope could indeed be, shall we say, not the nicest fellow and a bit of an over indulger in the department of alcohol. Nobody's perfect. Bettis is a tireless tiresome self promoter sometimes. Aren't we all? Palmer's been dead for five years and nobody's had the heart to tell him. Leyland did smoke like a fiend and Madden's jokes about him were funny.

Do we all have to pay homage to these overblown "personalities?" Can't some of us be cynical toward their alleged greatness? I don't care if Mark doesn't go to the locker room. Getting a standard jock bite from Hines Ward usually ads zero to my understanding. And I know he totally sucks up to Mario and the Pens. That's his bias.
He's a hockey homer. He loves him some hockey. But that is evident to anyone who listens. And who gives a shit?

The media has no money. They're either not making a profit, or barely, and trying to squeeze every dollar out of everything. So they're afraid to take chances. So, it's often BORING AS SHIT. Let's hope we can carve out a little niche' for the Maddens of the world.

Must everything be Wonder Bread?


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ROCK ON MAC-YIPPERS!

email me at johnmcintire@comcast.net

Thursday, May 22, 2008

RECOUNTING THE RECOUNT EDITION


MacYapper - John McIntire



FREE CYRIL! GO PENS! GET WELL TEDDY!


www.izzazu.com

Yo, yo, yo, MacYippers! What up?
We'll get to fond reminiscences, or perhaps not so fond, of the infamous Stolen Election of 2000, one of the all time low points in American history (and we've had a few), in a moment.

But first, Mayor Opie is a tool.

MAYOR OPIE IS A TOOL'S TOOL


A complete, utter, tool. Or maybe douchebag. Douchebag? Do you believe in separating the douche and the bag? Two words? One word?

One mayor. One tool. One douchebag, under God, indivisible, with douches and bags for all.

Is he really the wimp he's pretending to be in this "how can we hang up giant Go Pens banners and make it legal" nonsense? And is he really the idiot he's pretending to be in this "how can I go to the game in Detroit and have it be legal" nonsense?

POST-GAZETTE.COM:
http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/08143/883869-53.stm
The Penguins floated a plan to adorn the skyscraper with huge pictures of captain Sidney Crosby and goaltender Marc-Andre Fleury, wearing Reebok logos. The shoe company's name and slogan, "Your Move," also would appear on the banners.

Council heard about the plan at a Monday afternoon meeting between administration officials and some council members and staff. The administration brought draft legislation that would have created a special section of the zoning code to allow 40-by-85-foot Penguins banners on Downtown buildings for the next few weeks.

Is that good lawmaking?

"I would've called it sketchy at best," said council President Doug Shields. "We felt there was a way to work through it."

MacYapper - I'm sorry, but if these bozos can't figure a legal way to hang giant Go Pens signs for a few days, whether they're sponsored by corporate whores or not, then they're much bigger idiots than I've given them credit for.

Now the Pens have given up. Because they don't to get involved in this small time, small town, small minded, bullshit. They have a Stanley Cup to win.

Honestly, the fact that this is a major issue that requires scratching of heads and chins is absurd.

And then there's Mayor Cheapy McCheapstein. "How can I go to Detroit for the game if I can't accept a free ticket, and free transportation?" (made up quote mine but sums up the Dildo's Dilemma).

As Mr. Peduto-head says, write a freaking check. You earn a decent salary Bozo. Spend a couple of bucks for chrissakes. You're an embarrassment to embarrassments.

Jesus.

Char over at the Pist-Gazette has a much more detailed accounting of Opie's buffoonery.
Click below.

http://pistgazette.blogspot.com/2008/05/how-to-tips-from-lying-dirt-bag.html

WHAT IF THEY STOLE AN ELECTION AND MADE A MOVIE ABOUT IT?

So how many of you remember the 2000 stolen election? Antonin "The Election Thief" Scalia has been out on the stump lately telling us we should "get over it." If I had participated in the wholesale thievery of the U.S. presidency for my favorite candidate, I, too, would be anxious for people to put it behind them.


Why am I bringing up ancient history? Because HBO has a movie recounting the events, if you will... and I know you will because you're such a slut. It's called "Recount."
It's on Sunday night at 9.

Recount star Kevin Spacey has been hitting the talk shows to promote it. I saw him in Morning Joe this morning. He was hysterical when he kept shouting at a WAPO reporter who was talking to him in those TV double boxes, but was actually a few feet away at another in-studio location. Spacey said he was at the "kids table." Maybe you had to be there.

Pat Buchanan was also on set. One of the few honest moments of Pat's life was when he conceded that the poorly constructed butterfly ballot resulted in hundreds, perhaps thousands of people in Palm Beach, Florida, who wanted to vote for Gore, accidentally ended up voting for him.


Spacey said he wasn't trying to prove anything in particular. But he did note that the U.S. SUPCO 5-4 vote which stopped the voting had no legal precedent whatsoever. And that's how you know they made it up.


Laura Dern apparently is excellent as the overly made up bizarro to-the-max Katherine Harris. Tom Wilkinson nails Jim Baker.

REUTERS.COM:
http://www.reuters.com/article/reviewsNews/idUSN2240074620080522
That year, it all came down to Florida's electoral votes. The initial machine count favored Bush by a few thousand votes. Gore and his designee, former Secretary of State Warren Christopher, were ready to call it quits. But new evidence cast doubt on the numbers. Cue the national debate about butterfly ballots and hanging chads.

Gore reversed course, turning the fight in Florida over to Ron Klain (Kevin Spacey), his former chief of staff; national field director Michael Whouley (Denis Leary); and expert lawyer David Boies (Ed Begley Jr.). Directing the better-financed Bush effort were former Secretary of State James Baker (Tom Wilkinson) and national counsel Benjamin Ginsberg (Bob Balaban).

MacYapper - Warren Christopher has already publicly complained that he is portrayed, unfairly and inaccurately, as a wimp. I'm guessing it's a more or less accurate portrayal. Not in the sense that he was afraid to fight. But he had a diplomat's "the eyes of the world are on us" high falutin' mentality. Baker came to play and came to win.

Baker has backed Christopher's account that the Christopher portrayal was unfair. But what's Jimbo gonna say? He's portrayed as the brilliant maestro. He can afford to be generous.


I'll still never get over Gore sending Bill Daly, son of Chicago mayor and legendary election thief Richard The First, down to Florida. The symbolism was horrible.
Won't you go home Bill Daly, won't you go home, bum bum bum bum.

Spacey also brings up the fact that 18 counties never did what they should have done, a recount. When an election is this close, everyone is duty bound to count the votes at least one more time, during which the results, at least a tad, almost always change.

Of course today we still have voting machines without paper trails. We still have partisan and/or incompetent election officials supervising the proceedings. We still have very little confidence in our election machinery, real and metaphoric. Which means despite the fiasco of 2000 we haven't done diddly squat to fix it.


Meanwhile, the incredibly worthless Joe Lieberman screwed the Gore campaign mid-recount. The campaign had decided to play hardball on military ballots, and not allow ALL of them to be counted if they didn't meet the legal specs required. But then Lieberman folded like a house of cards on Meet The Press.


SFGATE.COM:
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2008/05/22/entertainment/e055450D98.DTL
Watching alongside Waters, lawyer Mark Herron was able to predict one scene. The actor portraying him was on a conference call with Gore running mate Joe Lieberman and telling him military ballots received after the election could be counted if they didn't have a postmark, but not if they weren't dated and didn't have a witness signature proving they were filled out before the election.

The voice of Lieberman in the film seemed to understand, and the Gore team appeared relieved.

"Then came 'Meet the Press,'" the real Herron said. A split second later, the film cut to Lieberman on the Sunday morning talk show arguing that all military ballots should be counted regardless of how they were filled out, a position that hurt his own campaign.

The cursing that followed in "Recount" wasn't just real, it was understated, Herron said.

"That little scene with Lieberman? You heard somebody scream out some profanity there? They only captured part of it," Herron said.

MacYapper - Gore made some bad decisions. The worst may have been his selection of running mate.

Who really won in 2000? I occasionally admit the truth. The truth is we'll never know. And we'll never know because the U.S. Supreme Court stopped a statewide recount, one that obviously was necessary. They were playing by the rules. Each county had its own team of recounters. They may have had slightly different standards in some cases. And some county officials had their political bias. And it was argued that these differences made the recount unfair and unconstitutional. Unfair perhaps. But it was an absurd argument because this is the only system we have... county by county. If you declare Florida unfair for those reasons, you have to disallow the election results of every election we've ever had everywhere. The SUPCO decision was absurd, partisan, and outrageous.

We may never know who really won. But we know who stole it.

HILLARY'S OUT OF HER FREAKING MIND

There she is in Florida, evoking images of the Stolen Election, and she has the audacity to actually claim she is a victim similar to that of Al Gore.

What makes the argument completely absurd? Her opponent wasn't even on the ballot in Michigan. And yet she thinks those votes ought to count. Neither contest was fair and square because nobody campaigned. And she's acting as if it was a normal election.
The only reason the elections were screwed up is that the Democratic party can't get its shit together.

The Stolen Election of 2000 was a travesty of biblical proportions.
Billary's whining is sore loser sour grapes.
Could we please, possibly, maybe, potentially, just move the hell on now????????

THE OBEY HOUSE COMEDY WITH SPECIAL GUEST ACTOR/COMIC T.J. MILLER

Tonight at 9pm. For more go to www.myspace.com/MacYapper

ROCK ON MAC-YIPPERS!

email me at johnmcintire@comcast.net

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

C'MON GET CAPPY! EDITION


MacYapper - John McIntire



FREE CYRIL! GO PENS! GET WELL TEDDY!


www.izzazu.com

Yo, yo, yo, MacYippers! What up?
Yes for some reason when I read about the lawsuit against former PA SUPCO Chief Justice Ralph Cappy, the Partridge Family's "C'mon Get Happy" song wafted into my head. The product of a misspent youth.


C'mon Get Cappy is the aim of the League of Women Voters lawsuit, alleging that Ralphy Boy made a deal with lawmakers. Ralph allegedly said, give me and the boys a pay raise (me and the boys being judges and justices) and we might look kindly upon lawsuits that legislators want to come out a certain way. Such as, for example, the lawsuit challenging the legality of the law that legalized casino gambling in PA.

Now journalists get criticized a lot for using anonymous sources. At this point, the League is resting its laurels, or its case anyway, on anonymous sources.
At the time of the post-pay-raise outrage, Ralphy Boy issued a statement saying it was much ado about nothing, and a "knee-jerk" reaction.

Here's my "knee-jerk" reaction to this lawsuit. No judge has the balls to piss off Ralphy Boy, even though he's retired. And the anonymous sources make it look a bit weak. So the suit will go nowhere in the long run.

But I'll be my Aunt Gladys' genitals (and they're very valuable to her) that Ralph's dirty on this one.

My eyes were opened long ago to the potential corrupt nature of judges and justices, no matter what grand high exalted poobah position they hold. Witness Bush vs. Gore.
Ralphy Boy enjoys a good reputation. He's a 'Burgher. But PA politics is corrupt. Period. Even non-rocket scientists like your MacYapper get that.


POST-GAZETTE.COM:
http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/08142/883433-85.stm
The lawsuit quotes several unnamed legislators, one of whom gave this account:

"[A]t some point during the Pay Raise Negotiations defendant proclaimed to members of one of the legislative caucuses that 'he needed the pay raise to secure the votes of Republican justices' on cases important to that legislative caucus," the suit says.

The suit quotes another legislator, described in the complaint as "House Member A," saying he "had run into Justice [Ronald] Castille at the Golden Sheaf restaurant at the Harrisburg Hilton Hotel and inquired about the Act 71 Litigation, to which Justice Castille gave a 'wink and a nod' to House Member A which he/she interpreted as clearly indicating and communicating that Act 71 would be held constitutional."

That same unidentified House member is also reported in the suit as having "witnessed Justices Castille and Eakin leaving a closed door meeting" held in the offices of then-Majority Leader Sam Smith, R-Punxsutawney.

MacYapper - Now the League says the secret squirrel sources will show up for depositions and will tell the truth. Still, and even though I believe in the premise, this seems very difficult to prove.
The Trib, my spiritual and psychological editorial soul mate, agrees.

TRIBUNE REVIEW:
http://www.pittsburghlive.com/x/pittsburghtrib/opinion/archive/s_568504.html
Talk of such putrid deal-making has been floating around Harrisburg for years. Cappy calls the allegations "preposterous." Of course, "talk" and "evidence" are two different things. And this lawsuit appears to be woefully heavy on the former and remarkably thin on the latter.

MacYapper - The talk of such putrid deal making is often true. BTW, don't you love the word "putrid"? I hope the League knows what its doing. I know this. They put on the most boring local political debates ever. They're always snoozers. But that doesn't mean they don't know how to hire good lawyers.

It would be splendid if corrupt justices got their justice deserts. But don't hold your breath.

The Trib points out you can indict a ham sandwich. And when I think of a ham sandwich, I think of Arlen Specter. Which has nothing to do with anything. I'm just sayin'.



OPIE PENS AN OP-ED... WELL KINDA... LITTLE BOYS SOMETIMES NEED HELP
So every newspaper lets local public officials publish some bullshit boosterism crap every now and then. Go team go. Go town go. Golly Gee, we live in the bestest place ever. Yessir! MMM Hmmm! So I understand why Opie allegedly put pen to paper (apparently he stopped washing his hands for long enough to write something).

But when the whole thing consists of very few paragraphs and contains the simplest of ideas (report panhandlers, report litter)... why did Opie need to pen-pal up with someone (in this case Mike Edwards president of the Pittsburgh Downtown Partnership).
The web version makes it look like Lukey wrote it his own self. But the print version clearly has a double byline.
http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/08142/883393-35.stm
If you experience harassment by a panhandler, call 911-- a beat cop will be right around the corner. If you see litter, call 311-- our public works crew will be there to pick it up.

MacYapper - Really. Really? I see a candy wrapper on the sidewalk, I deal 311, and some yutz rushes right over to scoop it up?
So I know I'm being nit picky here, but the next time Lil' Opie wants to put pen to paper, perhaps he could do it all by his lonesome. Just maybe to put to rest doubts that he can't find his ass with both hands.

I'm just sayin.'


SUPER DELEGATES NEED TO FIND TESTICLES


Remember when Jason Altmire defeated Missie Hart? What a horse face, uh, horse race that was.


Well Jason, like all Congressman, is a Super Delegate.


And understandably he doesn't want to alienate women in his district by coming out for Barack. But here's the thing. The Clintons are actually encouraging Super Delegates NOT to come out until the convention in August. They're still praying for a miracle. They're still hoping The Black Dude will step on his appendage, no racist pun intended. So some Supers like Jason are going to have to come out of the closet early, no Altmire vs. Hart pun intended, if this thing is going to be settled in June.

Jason, sometimes you just have to say WTF?


And what about Mikey Doyle? No opposition. Balls of steel helped him vote against the Iraq war resolution. Mikey, whadtya waitin' for? You still da man.

Well, I'm out. I've got this craving for a ham sammich. Wonder what Arlen's doin.'

COMEDY SHOW WITH SPECIAL GUEST T.J. MILLER TOMORROW NIGHT

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email me at johnmcintire@comcast.net

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

WHAT DO WOMEN WANT? EDITION


MacYapper - John McIntire



FREE CYRIL! GO PENS!


www.izzazu.com

Yo, yo, yo, MacYippers! What up?
Before we tackle this age old question, in the context of The White Chick vs. The Black Dude, we must make a few quick observations.

First of all, BREAKING NEWS... Senator Ted Kennedy has a malignant brain tumor according to MSNBC.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080520/ap_on_go_co/kennedy
BOSTON - A cancerous brain tumor caused the seizure Sen. Edward M. Kennedy suffered over the weekend, doctors said Tuesday in a grim diagnosis for one of American politics' most enduring figures.

Doctors for the Massachusetts Democrat say tests conducted after Kennedy suffered a seizure this weekend show a tumor in his left parietal lobe. Preliminary results from a biopsy of the brain identified the cause of the seizure as a malignant glioma

MacYapper - As much as MacYapper has made jokes at Kennedy's expense in standup, he is probably the finest Senator in the institution when it comes to fighting for the right causes. We are sad that the old lion has to go through this hell. Good luck Teddy.


OTHER RANDOM OBSERVATIONS

1. If they close Pittsburgh's Schenley High School the earth will not crash into the sun. The heavens will not become a fiery hell sealing out doom. Re-freaking-lax.
We can't afford to fix it. Stop being such a Pittsburgher and MOVE ON.
http://post-gazette.com/pg/08141/883230-298.stm

2. West Virginia University President Mike Garrison is a corrupt old-school back room punk who deserves to be fired. If they don't fire him, it'll just prove what a good-ol'-boy pond scum Backwardsville West Virginia is. I'm betting he survives.
http://post-gazette.com/pg/08141/883242-298.stm

3. My Minneapolis correspondent Pete laments the screwed up accountant apparently employed by Al Franken. The former SNL dude/actor/comedian apparently was late in paying state taxes in some states in which he performed and received income. According to the latest poll, he has taken a hit. He's not 7 points down to Norm Coleman. It'll be a bummer if Al loses because he has a lousy accountant.

http://www.startribune.com/politics/state/19057229.html?location_refer=$sectionName
Meantime, Jesse Ventura is apparently seriously pondering an indy run for the MN Senate seat. Some people just don't know when to get off the freaking stage.

Says Minneapolis correspondent Pete: "A New Yorker writer once interviewed him in his office while he was governor, and afterward told the KQ morning show that he thinks Jesse is "frozen" in that pubescent mode where kids care only about themselves."

4. The Christian group upset by the Starbucks logo because the mermaid's fins are spread is the single stupidest organization of humans on earth.
http://www.startribune.com/nation/18969709.html?location_refer=Golf


But the Starbucks logo brings an interesting debate to light.


This is a tough one. On the one hand, you could have some charming conversations with the one on the left. On the other hand...

If you have any thoughts you can email me at johnmcintire@comcast.net

WHAT DO WOMEN WANT

I suppose it's arguably sexist to even pose the question if you're being hyper sensitive. Or even if you're not. I read on the "internets" that what they want is confidence. Not domination. Not smothering. But an air of confidence.

Maybe that's how Bill landed Hill. He seems to have that kind of "I betcha if I give it a try and hang in there I can get into her pants" kind of confidence. Man, that must have taken a crowbar or two. Am I getting pretty sexist here? Apparently.
My apologies.


But let's narrow our focus. Let's refine our parameters. Let's twist again, like we did last summer.

We need to figure out what Hillary wants. The presidency. But she can't have it. And she knows it. Doesn't she? After long and careful thought, some poached eggs and stale English muffins, I've concluded she can't be as delusional as she appears.
She's not dumb. She's a realist. She's a pragmatist. That's part of her appeal.

So why soldier on in Kentucky? Why Shrillary her way through umpteen more speeches when she knows the large woman has vocalized? Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near?


Does she want the Vice-Presidency? I have to believe she does. It used to be a warm pitcher of spit, and I understand the actual quote is pitcher of piss but it was changed over the years to honor the delicate sensibilities of the American public (who now show up at the Blue Collar Comedy Tour and fart along with the comic).

But Al Gore and Dick Cheney have changed all that. Plus it would be historical. Plus it gives her a leg up in '08 if The Black Dude loses, or even in '12 if he wins two terms. And it gives Billary access. You can't buy that kind of access. Well, maybe you can. But it's still tough.

I'm not asking if you think The Black Dude will be dumb enough to give her the gig. I'm posing the question, is that what Billary wants?


I'm guessing yes. Because I cannot understand what the point is otherwise. I've wracked my brain. Rickety-wrack, rickety-wrack, Barry may lose 'cause he's black.
But I say he pulls it off.

Meantime, MacYipper Linda has some extensive thoughts on The White Chick.

MAC-YIPPER LINDA'S BILLARY COMMENTARY:

Hi ho, MacYapper,

What Clinton supporters don't understand is that Hillary not only comes with baggage, she comes with Bill Clinton. And while many Democrats are nostalgic for the Clinton years, others of us remember biting out nails off during the impeachment, hoping that Bill's fecklessness and Republican political theater wouldn't sink the Constitution. As it was, the impeachment circus ironically made it seemingly impossible to hold BushCo accountable for its high crimes and misdemeanors. She lsot my support when she started talking up McCain to trash a Democrat. She stepped off the edge of the clif entirely when she quoted Karl Rove as an authority in Democratic politics today.

Then there is the matter of Mark Penn, who appears to be a combination of karl Rove and Jack Abramoff without Rove's weasel cunning and Abramoff's taste in hats. Just couldn't bring myself to vote for someone who would have a guy running her campaign who was simultaneously putting together a trade deal with a foreign coutnry hoping to suck the rest of our jobs south of the border. To top it off, Bubba himself was sniffing around that Colombian trade deal. And that is just what we know about.

Hillary hasn't just opened the door for women to run for president; she has probably opened the door for anyone who legally qualifies to give it a shot. We're still waiting for the first Jew, Italian, Mormon, Asian, Hispanic, or Scientologist president. Now that Hillary and Barack have paved the way, with some help from Mitt Romney, why should anyone hesitate? I assume that we've probably had a gay president somewhere along the line and just didn't know it, given the number of politicians, athletes, and businessmen living in the closet.

No doubt she has encountered stupid scrutiny of her pantstuits, her hair, her laugh, and so on. But if a man had cried in New Hampshire... game over. I understand why women are disappointed but there was no way I would vote for anyone just because she was a woman, especially given the critical need to get the Republicans out of the White House, the Justice Department, and the double-secret safe location where Cheney is plotting World War 3.

MacYipper Linda



MacYapper - Well Linda, as Ms. Lewinsky once said, that's quite a mouthful. I believe Ed Muskie already did cry in New Hampshire, and it was indeed, game over.


But I'm proud of you for being a woman who obviously supports women's rights, and yet you're able to put the priority of removing the GOP from the White House ahead of all else. Because it is that important. Now if The Black Dude goes down to a humiliating defeat in the fall, we'll all be gnashing our teeth and wishing we'd gone with The White Chick. But it's all academic.

Because you see we had this little thing called a primary contest. And the Black Dude won. You can't make up new rules. And even Billary can't will its way into the White House.

When TBD doesn't offer her the warm pitcher of piss, I wonder if she'll still campaign for him? Or is that the blackmail trump card? "I want the VEEP or I'll half heartedly mumble for you and take delight when you crash and burn."

What does Hillary want? And what will she do when she doesn't get it?

COMEDY THURSDAY NIGHT!

THE OBEY HOUSE
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Cost: FREE
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MacYapper, Gab Bonesso, Brad Ryan... and recently added special guest, Actor/Comedian T.J. Miller, slumming through Pittsburgh shooting a movie! For a sample of his work click below:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m19ZninVeO8

It's a great place to become inebriated. We really need more of those in Pittsburgh.

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email me at johnmcintire@comcast.net

Monday, May 19, 2008

BLOGGING THE BLOG EDITION


MacYapper - John McIntire



FREE CYRIL! GO PENS!


www.izzazu.com

Yo, yo, yo, MacYippers! What up?
A sad note about a local man I barely knew, but who made a major impression on me. He was a beacon of sanity amid the post 9/11 anti-Muslim fervor, when American ignorance and hatred dominated the landscape, and sanity and understanding went out the freaking window.

Syed Farooq Hussaini, who went by his middle name Farooq, is dead. I interviewed him on NightTalk in the days after 9/11, when the air was thick with maroons who wanted to lynch everyone who appeared to be of Middle Eastern descent.

Dennis Roddy reports in the PG that he died of kidney disease.


POST-GAZETTE.COM:
http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/08140/883114-100.stm
Syed Farooq Hussaini, director of interfaith relations for the Islamic Center of Pittsburgh, died yesterday after a long battle with kidney disease. He was 50.

A frequent lecturer on Islam, he served on the Religious Leadership Forum of Southwestern Pennsylvania and was a member of the Daughters and Sons of Abraham program at Carlow University.

MacYapper -
I remember Farooq having the courage to be the local face of Muslim Americans not long after 9/11. I remember him putting up with annoying hostile callers. I remember him being a man of common sense and wisdom. He calmed the waters by explaining the difference between the crazies who perpetrated this, and your average Islamist. He explained that the religion really didn't glorify killing, and in fact condemned it. He was clear, concise, knowledgeable, and just what the doctor ordered.

Again, I barely knew him. But he made a huge impression on me. The world needs more smart and grave guys like Farooq.

JOURNALISTS WHO THINK THEY'RE GOD VS. BLOGGERS


So I've been watching portions of this Bob Costas debate about blogging versus mainstream journalism. Because it's Bob, it's all about sportsy-ness. Sportsyosity.
So he's got this big fat ass of an MSM sports reporter who's yelling at a blogger.
He's yelling at the blogger, who runs www.deadspin.com, because he says the standards are not up to snuff. He's particularly outraged about the "comments" section, in which various sportsies are referred to as douchebags or a-holes or whatever.

While acknowledging that I don't allow for comments on this blog because I don't want to take the time to police them, it is absurd for MSM maroons to criticize blogs because they allow average Joes and Joannes to vent with moronic language in print.

People can tell the difference. The big fat loud MSM guy challenged the blogger on his knowledge of big time legendary sports writers. Then he demanded to know who could "evoke" the spirit of a ballgame more, a legendary guy, or some hack in his underwear?


Of course it's the legend. But bloggers are not there to "evoke." Even Costas, a bit of an MSM snob his own self, was quoting idiotic comments as if that proved that the blogs weren't worth the cyberspace they're printed on.


As the blogger pointed out, the MSM guys don't get to decide what is and is not cricket in the blogosphere. The print snobs didn't like TV and now they're being forced to do TV... video on the print websites, hourly deadlines instead of daily because of the "internets"... so they may not flow forth with wonderful prose like the good old days, faced with constant pressure to crank the shit out.

The big fat MSM guy was yelling about "standards." What about "credentials" and "access"? First of all, sports is an f'ing joke. Everybody cheats. Nobody cares. And let's not forget big fat MSM guy... IT'S A FREAKING GAME FOR CHRISSAKES.

Just because you love it like a son and cherish its contrived records and alleged legendary moments, doesn't make it ACTUALLY IMPORTANT. So let's just lighten up, bub.

These days it's just a big business. Of course, it always has been, but it's even more corrupt now that more money is at stake. And the owners don't care. Witness Dan Rooney trying to sweep New England's spygate under the rug. He knows Coach Billy cheated. He's just concerned that a perception that the game isn't fair will alienate butts in the seats. He just wants to make money. And he also knows that everybody cheats, if they can figure out how, but Coach Billy just took it to a new level.

Sportsies taking themselves WAY TOO SERIOUSLY aside (and they HAVE to get over themselves), they obviously don't understand the blogosphere. One Costas panelist said he can't believe a guy's opinion unless he knows where the guy's coming from, how much experience he has, and whether his publication has any credibility. Here's a helpful hint dude. Don't read blogs. Simple. You don't believe 'em? Don't read 'em.

The sportsies talked about "access." The Post Gazette's Bob Smizik recently bitched about talker Mark Madden's not showing up to talk to athletes in the locker room (while discussing the Costas show and the fact that Madden's name was mentioned)
http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/08129/880065-194.stm and concluded that's why he bitches about Hines Ward and Jerome Bettis, because he doesn't have to face them.


That's why I like Madden. And it does temper a columnist's criticism if you have to face them. I enjoy that he takes on the big shots because everyone else simply swallows there appendages and the accompanying accouterments. People are tired of the sameness and frankly often boring nature of MSM journalism.

I was an MSM reporter for years. I understand the desire for standards, ethics, and big meetings with many important people standing around scratching their chins.
But, particularly in sports, it's ok just to shoot off your mouth. Because it offends the sensibilities of the holier-than-thou longtime sportsies doesn't make it wrong.


DID THE WHITE CHICK LOSE BECAUSE SHE'S A CHICK?
So there are all sorts of pissed off women. There they were, poised to capture the presidency, when some haircut who looks cute in a suit comes out of left field and steals it. They say there was sexism involved. Of course there was. In the sense that there is always sexism involved with men and women, and there is always racism involved with whites and blacks.


But was it the determining factor? Is that why she lost? I would say no. Opinion is mixed in this interesting NYT piece.
NYTIMES.COM:

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/19/us/politics/19women.html?_r=2&oref=slogin&partner=MYWAY&adxnnlx=1211191320-3f%20LWxMJoE%20zlbaMhirBLQ&pagewanted=print&oref=slogin


“Women felt this was their time, and this has been stolen from them,” said Marilu Sochor, 48, a real estate agent in Columbus, Ohio, and a Clinton supporter. “Sexism has played a really big role in the race.”

Not everyone agrees. “When people look at the arc of the campaign, it will be seen that being a woman, in the end, was not a detriment and if anything it was a help to her,” the presidential historian Doris Kearns Goodwin said in an interview. Mrs. Clinton’s campaign is faltering, she added, because of “strategic, tactical things that have nothing to do with her being a woman.”

MacYapper - The Clinton team blew it. They ran like the front runner instead of the underdog fighter chick. That allowed someone else to be the come-from-behind fighter person for whom America is a sucker. You know Billary's favorite analogy, Rocky Balboa?


NYTIMES.COM:
Janet Napolitano, the Democratic governor of Arizona, said the world was different now, especially the political world, thanks in part to Mrs. Clinton. “I never heard anybody say she can’t be elected because she’s a woman,” said Ms. Napolitano, who supports Mr. Obama and like many of his supporters saw less sexism in the race than Mrs. Clinton’s backers. “That’s a different deal than we’ve heard before in American politics.”

But as others watched a campaign that starred two possibly transformative figures, they felt a growing conviction that the contest was unfair. Mrs. Clinton’s supporters point to a nagging series of slights: the fixation on her clothes, even her cleavage; chronic criticism that her voice is shrill; calls for her to exit the race; and most of all, the male commentators in the news media who, they argue, were consistently tougher on her than on Mr. Obama.

MacYapper - That may have been true for a time, but the Reverend Wright evened things out. The Black Dude was hit with a constant barrage of criticism that may well have sunk him, had he not confronted it with the race speech in Philly. In the end they were both smacked with boatloads of criticism, some of it undeserved. Welcome to politics.

And call me sexist if you like, but her voice IS shrill. It was just stabbing my eardrums courtesy of MSNBC. She's in Kentucky, in denial. She's still dropping her g's. Those media bigshots who are "tellin'" you. Could it be any phonier?

Women politicians aren't necessarily shrill, any more then men are. Shrillary is.


NYTIMES.COM:
“The most important contribution she has made is to show that women candidates are just like men candidates,” said Joan Scott, a historian at the Institute for Advanced Study. “You have to judge them not on the basis of their gender but their character.”

Over the course of the campaign, Jennifer Rogers, a film producer in Los Angeles, came to agree. She voted for Mrs. Clinton, in part because she hoped to see a female president, but she recently lost enthusiasm over what she called a lack of truthfulness on the candidate’s part. “Her problems are about who she is and not her gender,” said Ms. Rogers, 28.

MacYapper - Bingo. And that sniper fire thing was really embarrassing. Only one of these candidates has to worry about sniper fire.


But it's almost time to move on, and so we've got to stop ragging on Billary. We'll need her supporters. Yes, many have been alienated for good, but hopefully not most.

The Times makes an important point. She has made women presidential candidates credible forever more. And that has advanced the cause of women's rights. And that's a good thing. Thank you Hillary.

You'll still be a kick-ass senator and a fascinating historical figure. And no I don't think it'll be too late for you in 2016! You'll be 68 years young.

COMEDY TONIGHT AT THE SHADOW LOUNGE!


Mo Mozuch runs this hipster room in the east end. I'll be there. Gab Bonesso will be there. Other funny-ass comics will be there. 8pm, man. I say "man" because I wanna be a hipster.
5972 Baum Blvd
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